Interesting Observation

[ministerswife]

1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL.
2 The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING
3 The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.
4 The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL.
5 The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS.
and........
6 The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers is GOLF.

THE AMAZING CONCLUSION:

The higher you go in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

<center>[rotfl]</center>

[Chutney Daftcraft]

nice.

Anyone play golf? If so, please tell me what the point of golf is. I know it's about making deals and what-not, but seriously. Any sport that can be played in the same clothes that you go to the office in isn't exactly sporty to me.

[derricksonb]

I play golf........ There are many points to golf. Realistically the goal is to see who can get their little white balls in 18 different holes using the least number of strokes......... As one would imagine this takes skill. Some would say it's a nothing more than a quiet walk through the woods interupted by a little white ball. It's an excuse for men to get drunk in public and smoke cigars with little or no recourse. This type of behavior is expected and encouraged otherwise they wouldn't have a cart stocked full of the stuff being driven around by some 22 year old coed hottie in skimpy clothes. It's damned near like having an outdoor strip club....... Only they don't offer lap dances, but thats an idea.........

The number one reason why men play golf and also the reason that it costs $75.00 a round is because it's a guaranteed 4-5 hours that we don't have to listen to our wives bitch. It's actually a bargain. $75.00 for 5 hours of peace and solitude is PRICELESS.

[Chutney Daftcraft]

Bryan? It's time you looked into the option of divorce.

Set Brandy free. If she's such an evil life-ruiner, then maybe it's time for her to ruin some other man's life. Have any male enemies?

Just think of the advantages. Child support. A small apartment while paying for a house that you don't live in. The series of girlfriends that give you HPV and warts. The black camaro in the driveway of your old house driven by an incredibly hot and strapping man that is def-def-definately keeping her satisfied. Why doesn't she complain to him? Why is he there so much? What are those sounds coming out of what used to be your bedroom? Why does she look sooooooo happy?

...something to think about...

[derricksonb]

I have. She won't sign the papers............. :D

[Chutney Daftcraft]

Uh, have you ever thought about becoming one of the people who cannot get married?

My recruitment numbers are low - so if you'd like, I can stop by and deliver your complimentary cuisinart - yours to keep - as we go over the benefits of a lifestyle change. Think of it as being born again, except for the whole damning yourself to hell part.

Then the only problem you'll have is that you'll be buying beer for 2. The benefit is that your house will be so tastefully decorated, that you'll wonder how so many pastels can go together without looking like an easter egg.

[grafxgirl]

He complains, but he loves me...besides, who would clean up after him the way I do? Don't let him fool you. He's got a good life with me. I don't know anyone else who could tolerate his stubborn butt!

[Chutney Daftcraft]

Ok, then. Send the camaro on over to MY driveway when you're done with it.

He doesn't have a good life with you. Not at all.

He had a good life BECAUSE of you.

[derricksonb]

A Cuisinart? You're trying to lure me to the darkside so I can make some Effing Cole Slaw? Please man at least offer something useful like a custom ordered pastel Cracksman Tool set with laser guidance and flexi-grips. What's next? You gonna throw in a fondue pot?

And I don't need you GG, so don't get all high and mighty and self important on us. I learned how to use the thing that sucks the dirt out of the floors and the thing that spins the clothes around with the water and sudsy stuff.

[Chutney Daftcraft]

Oh no you ditn't. That's called a vaccuum cleaner. That's called a washing machine.

Here's some skills you must acquire before you open the mouf:

Ironing
Dusting
Cooking without the BBQ
writing checks to utilities and banks
money-management (i KNOW you need that)
nutrition beyond frito-lay
auto-fellatio

When you master them all, then you can talk to her like you married her in any of the states that had 10 commandment monuments on courthouse properties. In your wife beater. Standing on a pickup truck bed gate that also happens to be a coffee table.

[derricksonb]

Huh? Do What??????


Ironing- Throwing 2 day old laundry into the drier with a damp cloth produces the same results
Dusting- only when company's coming over or after one has demolitioned a wall in the living room which results in dust on the TV.
Cooking without the BBQ- What are you, Communist?
writing checks to utilities and banks- Online banking rules!!!!!!
money-management (i KNOW you need that)- I know if I walk in to Torlones with $12 in my pocket I can have 5 beers. Thats money management in my book. Otherwise VISA.
nutrition beyond frito-lay- Never touch the stuff. Too many preservatives not enough malted hopps and barley.
auto-fellatio- If I could do that I wouldn't be married.

And I'll let you know that last year my coffee table was my dining room table, but with some inspiration from them gay fellers on that Bravo network I put some pedestal thingies under 'em and now I have a very cool living space.